“Crafting my 21-Year-Old Self,” A Portrait Poem

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Hammering down on the mortal page, creating my double clothed in words.

Pockets of invisible light penetrating my skin, exposing ruby jewels: tissues, veins, & blood.

I build transparent cabinets, housing my strung together vignettes waiting to be unsealed.

I cross out uneven bangs from an unfortunate haircut for long, steady black waves.

I paint pensive, brown

wrapping themselves around a bouquet of fiction books and prayers.

I carve mountainous curves on my rosy lips which grumble & trace the sounds of Ancient Greek.

Smearing with crumbly charcoal, I erase Mandarin from the page.

I stick my sweet teeth together, the tools in my toolbox that work but can’t heal themselves.

I sketch roots into a pose where my lungs in rhythm compete,

igniting the organ whose thumps take precedence,

unlocking chambers where love is invisible but felt.

Leaving my sensible left hand perpetually smeared with ink & paint, suspended in writing.

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My portrait poem, “Crafting my 21-Year-Old Self,” depicts my struggle with accepting my Asian heritage and my American-ness and creating myself both on the page and in life. It is an anxious, yet fierce poem grappling with identity and presentation.